


Dick Punch

by legendofgrump



Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Gen, Punk Grumps
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-28
Updated: 2016-07-28
Packaged: 2018-07-27 09:09:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7612246
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/legendofgrump/pseuds/legendofgrump
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ross and Arin are huge fans of the super popular punk band Ninja Fuck Rock! Arin's tendency to faint when he gets too excited is sometimes a blessing and more often a curse.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dick Punch

Ross pounded on Arin’s bedroom door. After receiving a particularly distressed text from Arin and then getting no reply to any of this thirty plus responses, Ross had rushed over. “Arin!” he shouted for probably the ninth or tenth time. It wouldn’t be long before Arin’s parents got tired of the ruckus and kicked him out.

“I’m not coming out,” Arin finally called back, though it sounded muffled, as if he had his face shoved into his pillows.

“Then just open the door!” Ross let out an irritated huff. He wasn’t one to take not getting his way lightly.

Finally, the click of Arin’s lock sounded and Ross shoved his way into the room, a bit of frustration still present in the furrow of his brows. Arin was already collapsing back onto his bed, a groan following as his face made contact with the mattress.

“Okay, what the fuck?” Ross started, crossing his arms. “What do you mean you’re not going to the Ninja Fuck Rock concert this weekend?”

Arin turned his head to the side, letting his cheek press lazily into the blankets. “I’m not going, that’s it.”

“How could you not want to go?” It was almost more a declaration of exasperation than an actual question. “We haven’t missed one of their concerts since…ever! You can’t just ruin our streak because you don’t feel like going or whatever. We’re practically in with the band at this point, do you really wanna ruin that? Danny winked at you during the last show.”

“Exactly!” Arin bolted upright, his hands supporting his weight as he glared at Ross. “And do you remember what happened after that? I fainted in the middle of the show.”

Ross rolled his eyes. “So it’s your pride getting in the way? You don’t wanna go because you’re embarrassed? Dude, you fainting got us backstage passes, if I’d known that’s what happens, I would have fainted sixty shows ago.”

“You’re not getting it,” Arin huffed. He sat himself up on his bed, leaning his head back against the headboard. It was like talking to a brick wall with Ross. “If I fainted from a wink, imagine what will happen if I actually meet them. I’ll probably die right there on the spot and then they’ll think I’m weird.”

A grin stretched across Ross’s face, though the expression always looked a bit sadistic on him. “That’s what you’ve got me for, buddy! I’ll be your wingman, make sure you don’t faint again and fill in all the awkward parts.”

It hardly needed saying at this point, Ross had been doing that since they were kids. Arin was the shy one, Ross was the brash one. That was their dynamic and it worked. “I just don’t want to embarrass myself,” Arin admitted.

Ross threw himself onto the bed and gave Arin a pat on the back. “Nah, you won’t do that. I’ll look out for you. You’re not gonna let a few nerves get in the way of your biggest dream, are you?”

There was a moment of thought as Arin bit his lip in consideration. “I guess not,” he said, still a bit unsure.

———————————————

All the nerves came rushing back the night of the show. Arin and Ross had gone all the way from Los Angeles to San Francisco for the weekend, and now Arin was having second thoughts in the bathroom of their hotel room.

“Dude, come on, if we don’t get to the venue soon, we’re gonna get pushed against the back wall.” Ross’s knocks were much gentler than they were a few days ago. He seemed much more understanding of Arin’s nerves, probably because he was starting to get a few butterflies of his own. They were actually going to meet Ninja Fuck Rock tonight and there was something increasingly terrifying about it.

A hushed whimper could be heard on the other side of the door. When Arin spoke, his voice was weak and shaky. “I can’t go, man. I think I’m gonna vom.”

Ross’s brows furrowed. “We’re so close, Ar.” It was practically a plea, quiet and slightly desperate.

“I know, Ross. I’m sorry.”

————————————————

A few hours later, Arin was lying face down on the hotel bed, gently snoring. All the lights were out and the curtains had been drawn, but Ross still managed to slip out without tripping over anything.

Ross walked down the hallway, his socked feet shuffling along the coarse carpet lazily. His hands were stuffed in his pockets, shoulders hunched. He was hopelessly tired, despite not having even gone to the concert. Arin had tried to convince him to go alone, but Ross couldn’t. Half of it was nobility and not wanting to leave his friend behind, but part of Ross was terrified to go alone. NFR didn’t want to meet him anyway, he was invited backstage to be polite.

The hotel lobby was fairly empty, which Ross figured was probably because of how late it was. Most people were probably sleeping, like normal humans, at this hour. But fuck it, Ross was desperate for something to do and he really just needed to stretch his legs and get his mind off of the concert that he was missing.

“I’m sorry, ma’am, but we can’t just give out room numbers.” Ross’s ears perked up at the distressed explanation of the concierge. He couldn’t help but be a little nosy, what with this being the only interesting thing happening in the entire hotel.

“Sure! That’s great and all, but my boys cut their performance short and won’t leave the bus until I find out where these two kids are, so one of us is going to have to give in.” The woman at the counter spoke sternly, her arms crossed tightly over her chest. It was a stark contrast to the gentle pastels over her clothes and hair.

Ross did a double take, his mouth falling open at the sight of NFR’s manager, Holly Conrad. His body immediately began to shake and he crashed over the back of one of the lobby couches. He pulled himself up into a sitting position, peeking over the back of the furniture with wide eyes. If Holly was here, it could only mean that NFR was nearby.

“I’m sorry, my hands are tied,” said the concierge. “There’s nothing I can do for you.”

Holly let out a sigh. “What do you want? Autographs? Tickets? Come on, I have to find these guys or I’ll never get out of here. I have a tour to run, you know.”

The concierge looked offended, her mouth open to reprimand Holly for trying to bribe her, but Ross interjected. He hopped over the couch and stumbled over to the confrontation. “Hi, I couldn’t help overhearing and you’re—you’re Holly Conrad, right? NFR’s manager?”

“You got it,” she chirped. The stern look on Holly’s face melted into a soft smile, much more characteristic of her appearance. She politely shook Ross’s hand, obviously eyeing him up and down to see if he was of any interest to her.

The grin on Ross’s face seemed like it was stretching his face a bit too far. “I’m Ross—I mean, not that you care—I’m just a huge fan of NFR and it’s a huge honor to meet you. My friend and I go to all the shows and—“ Ross trailed off as Holly’s eyebrows furrowed and she began to eye him inquisitively.

“O’Donovan?” she asked abruptly.

Ross nodded quickly, his eyes blown wide at the mere thought that NFR could be aware of his existence.

“And your friend’s name is Arin Hanson?”

Another violent nod, Ross practically jittering with excitement. “How do you—Where’d you get our names?”

“You had backstage passes to tonight’s concert, didn’t you?”

“Yeah, but Arin wasn’t feeling well so we ended up skipping out on the concert. I mean, he tried, but he just couldn’t make it and I wasn’t gonna leave him all alone, that would have been a dick thing to do, y’know? We really wanted to come, but we just—“ Ross realized he was rambling and clamped his mouth shut.

Holly pushed her hands through her hair, mussing it up in exasperation. “I don’t believe this,” she muttered to herself before her gaze fell back onto Ross. “Looks like you’re just the guy I’ve been looking for. Do you think you could get your pal and bring him back down here? Dan and Brian are really torn up that they didn’t get to meet you tonight.”

Some ungodly squeak emitted from Ross’s vocal chords and he bit down on his lip to stop a full-fledge shriek from coming out. He gave Holly another nod and bolted for the staircase, not bothering to waste a second with the hotel’s elevator.

It took all of Ross’s might not to scream the entire way up to his and Arin’s room, but once he had crashed into the room, he couldn’t hold it in anymore. He hopped onto the bed where Arin was still laying—though he had since woken up and been mindlessly scrolling through his phone—and grabbed Arin by the shoulders, a manic grin on his face.

The words that came out of Ross’s mouth were surprisingly low and quiet, but the urgency was certainly there as he hissed out, “Arin, we need to go downstairs now.”

“What the hell…” Arin hardly got a chance to process Ross’s entrance before he was being pulled toward the door and out into the hallway. “Ross, explain!”

“Ninja Fuck Rock is looking for us and you have to come downstairs immediately because we’re going to meet them right now,” Ross demanded.

Arin immediately froze, making Ross stumble forward. “We’re doing what?” The nerves immediately returned, obvious by the way Arin’s hands shook and his gaze grew cold and distant.

“Dude, we’re fine,” Ross said, immediately trying to diffuse the nerves. He couldn’t let Arin chicken out of this again. “I’m gonna be there, you’re gonna be fine, and it’s going to be the best thing that’s ever happened to you. I promise.”

“You don’t know that,” Arin snapped.

With a roll of his eyes, Ross thought fast. “If I’m wrong you can punch me in the dick. Please just come with me.”

The two were already out in the hallway, leaving Arin with nowhere to run. He had to trust Ross on this or he’d never experience anything in his life. Plus, if he faints, he gets a free dick punch out of it. With a deep breath, Arin decided he had nothing to lose and let Ross lead him down the stairs.

———————————————

Every sense Ross and Arin had was being overwhelmed by pent up excitement as Holly lead the two to the tour bus. NFR was concerned about them. NFR wanted to meet them. NFR stopped an entire show because they noticed Ross and Arin weren’t there. Life didn’t even feel real anymore.

Holly banged on the tour bus, promptly being greeted by two dark clothed security figures. They seemed far less amiable than Holly, but it didn’t matter. They weren’t here to meet security.

“These are the guys,” Holly stated vaguely, gesturing to the giddy teen boys behind her.

The female security guard nodded, stepping out of the way so that the three could step onto the bus. The other stayed firm, frightening with his stony silence.

As the three boarded the bus, Holly called out, “I brought your guests.” It sounded a bit irritated, though they figured Holly really had to jump through some hoops to find Ross and Arin. But that didn’t stop the loving smirk that pulled at her lips as the two teens scrambled from the back of the bus to the front.

Dan pushed his way to the group first, a grin splayed over his face and his messy, neon blue curls falling and sticking up every which way. Brian stood behind him, looking much more composed, but a bit of excitement still dripped through his cool demeanor.

“Hey, what’s up!” Dan said. Holly squeezed past them and headed toward the back of the bus, but Dan and Brian were completely engrossed in their guests. “Brian and I were scared you guys had, like, died or something when you weren’t at our show today. You’re okay, right?”

Ross and Arin stared starry-eyed and hopelessly entranced. Brian leaned against Danny, a heavily tattooed arm draped over the other’s shoulder. “I don’t think they’re okay, dude.”

Dan snickered. “I guess we can’t blame them.” He turned his attention to Arin, his dazzling grin only making the fan more stuck for words. “You’re Arin, right cutie?”

There was a brief moment where it seemed like Arin might actually say something. Some kind of sound started to come out of his mouth, but was promptly interrupted by his swift collapse to the floor. The sharp thump of Arin hitting the floor knocked Ross out of his daze and the latter leaned down to try and wake up his friend.

“He’s fine, don’t worry about him,” Ross laughed desperately, shaking Arin in hopes of waking him up. “He’s just a little nervous or something. He’ll be up in a minute.” With a last nervous grin, Ross averted his gaze fully to Arin. Through gritted teeth, he muttered, “I swear to god, if you punch me in the dick for this, I’m gonna be so mad.”

Dan and Brian exchanged glances, which quickly turned into smirks. These guys were definitely worth chasing down.

**Author's Note:**

> I love this AU and had to write something for it immediately. There will be more, but mostly over at legendofgrump.tumblr.com


End file.
